Parents seem to underestimate the “distraction” factor in divorce — even if the level of conflict is not high.
All of the time that you end up spending on the divorce crap/restructuring of life is going to be taken from other things in life — like looking after your children … or yourself … or your career.
Then to compound the problem household money (which may be or get tight) goes to the divorce lawyers — into the college fund for the children of the divorce lawyer instead of the college fund of your children.
Divorce is going to distract you from life — and also separate you from assets.
Indulge me in a momentary departure to the absurd …
Did we learn in history class how Da Vinci or Michelangelo took a few years off of their art to get a divorce resolved? How Andrew Carnegie and John D. Rockefeller halted their industrialization efforts because their divorce cases were heating up and the divorce lawyers had staged a custody battle. That General Dwight Eisenhower and General Douglas MacArthur had to step out of the war efforts to return for depositions in their divorce cases. That Susan B. Anthony had to step down from her suffrage movement leadership because of her messy divorce case. That Marie Curie halted lab experimentation for three years because her divorce lawyer told her she could gain more money if she was an at-home mother.
… to make the point.
My observation is that divorce lawyers do not care how unproductive and counterproductive divorce is — it gives them a chance to meddle and disrupt and an attendant sense of power and authority that is certainly not earned by merit or by special talent.
Little concern is shown for the damage/wreckage.